{"id":3398,"date":"2024-03-12T15:39:42","date_gmt":"2024-03-12T14:39:42","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/kahlbom.com\/?p=3398"},"modified":"2024-03-12T15:39:42","modified_gmt":"2024-03-12T14:39:42","slug":"surviving-12-years-of-tweenie-tyranny-a-hilarious-mums-guide","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kahlbom.com\/index.php\/2024\/03\/12\/surviving-12-years-of-tweenie-tyranny-a-hilarious-mums-guide\/","title":{"rendered":"Surviving 12 Years of Tweenie Tyranny: A Hilarious Mum’s Guide"},"content":{"rendered":"

Greetings<\/strong>, fellow survivors of the tweenie apocalypse!
\nToday, I raise my coffee mug (because let’s face it, it’s too early for champagne) to celebrate a monumental achievement: my daughter has officially hit the 12-year mark on this wild rollercoaster called life. As her mother, I’ve been through more emotional twists and turns than a soap opera marathon, and I’m here to share the unfiltered truth about navigating the turbulent waters of tweenie-dom.<\/p>\n

Let’s start with the good stuff, shall we? My tweenie is as sharp as a tack, with a wit sharper than a chef’s knife on MasterChef. Seriously, her comebacks could make a stand-up comedian green with envy. And don’t even get me started on her knack for finding humor in the most mundane situations. Sure, her jokes might be as cheesy as a slice of month-old pizza, but hey, laughter is laughter, right?<\/p>\n

But oh, dear readers, for every moment of brilliance, there are ten moments of moody melodrama. One minute, she’s showering me with hugs and declaring her undying love; the next, she’s slamming her bedroom door so hard, I’m surprised it hasn’t fallen off its hinges yet. And let’s not even mention the eye rolls. Seriously, if eye rolls were an Olympic sport, my tweenie would have enough gold medals to rival Michael Phelps.<\/p>\n

Now, let’s talk about the laziness. Oh, the laziness. My tweenie has perfected the art of procrastination to a level that would make even the most seasoned slacker blush. Getting her to do her chores is like trying to negotiate world peace \u2013 futile and exhausting. And yet, despite her reluctance to lift a finger, she somehow manages to be the kindest, most compassionate soul I’ve ever known.<\/p>\n

Yes, my fellow parents, raising a tweenie is not for the faint of heart. But amidst the chaos and the eye rolls and the endless battles over screen time, there is a silver lining. Because beneath the moody exterior and the lazy tendencies lies a heart of gold \u2013 a heart that loves fiercely, cares deeply, and believes in magic with all its might.<\/p>\n

So here’s to you, my little warrior princess. Here’s to 12 years of laughter, tears, and everything in between. And here’s to many more years of navigating this crazy journey called motherhood, one eye roll at a time.<\/p>\n

I have children to annoy and coffee to sip.
\nUntil later darling ones, until later.<\/p>\n

\/L<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Greetings, fellow survivors of the tweenie apocalypse! Today, I raise my coffee mug (because let’s face it, it’s too early for champagne) to celebrate a monumental achievement: my daughter has officially hit the 12-year mark on this wild rollercoaster called life. As her mother, I’ve been through more emotional twists and turns than a soap … <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3399,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_themeisle_gutenberg_block_has_review":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[11],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3398","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-family","latest_post"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/kahlbom.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3398","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/kahlbom.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/kahlbom.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kahlbom.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kahlbom.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3398"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/kahlbom.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3398\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3401,"href":"https:\/\/kahlbom.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3398\/revisions\/3401"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kahlbom.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3399"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/kahlbom.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3398"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kahlbom.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3398"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kahlbom.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3398"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}